Moving,Moving Forward

Moving, Moving Forward!!

April 29th,2011

"I'm not going back, I'm moving ahead.I'm here to declare to you my past is over.In You all things are made new. Surrendered my Life to Christ. I'm Moving, Moving Forward."

First of all let me start by apologizing for the delay in blogging! My life has been crazy! When they tell you your WHOLE life will change after Gastric Bypass...I had no idea!!! I am now sixth months post op and still finding success in losing weight. I am down 90lbs and counting. Food has literally taken on a whole new identity in my life. Food is no longer a friend, comforter,lover,and or healer. As i am unable to eat large quantities of foods I simply cant worship the food as I did in the past. I am forced to reach out and reestablish friendships,feel emotion,hurt,pain as well as happiness, learn to love myself for who I truly am, and seek God for healing, health, and wholeness. This has most definitely been a challenging change in my life as I am in the middle of a divorce,custody fight, as well as a relocation.

I have been able to do allot more experimenting with food choices and have come to the understanding that as I can only eat a little at a time, what I do eat is going to be high quality, full flavor, and high in protein and nutrients...well for the most part...lol (Easter candy not included in this statement...lol) Check out some of the recipes that Ive been trying from my friend Amanda's blog. I eat much smaller amounts than posted but the food is fabulous!!

http://lowcalliving.blogspot.com/2011/04/this-recipie-was-created-by-my-friend.html

Losing this weight has been liberating and freeing. I have begun to get out into the world and start experiencing life. Playing in the park, climbing trees, and riding bikes with my four year old are activities that I never thought Id be able to do with him...I not only participate in these activities but enjoy them.I have done some traveling to visit family in MD and VA. as well as had many shopping trips with friends...I am actually able to shop in normal stores now...so fun!!! I am so blessed with this second chance at life and I don't plan on wasting it!!! I am in the process of relocating back to MD and am interviewing with multiple companies to establish my self in MD. I have also started to sing again after years of silence...It is spirit freeing. I plan on getting a CD together with in the next year so anyone who has connections call me!!!

Going through all these life changes all at once has been tough. I have now more than ever learned to lean on the Lord. when my strength is at an end his strength kicks in and carries me through. I hold tight to the promise of his word and know that God didn't bring me this far to drop me off. I walk through the trials and turmoil into his provision and grace!!! What a mighty God I serve! I am reminded of a quote taken from the late Rev. David Wilkerson ‎"To those going through the valley and shadow of death, hear this word: Weeping will last through some dark, awful nights, and in that darkness you will soon hear the Father whisper, "I am with you,'" I also keep repeating to my self (Don't tell God how big your storm is, Tell the storm how big your God is!) So much change yet so many blessings!!! Change is always hard yet always needed! As I walk this journey of self renewal and self improvement I ask that you keep me in your prayers. I pray for each one of you readers that I in some small way touch your life in a positive way...I leave you with a video of my offering of praise to our awsome God on Easter 2011! Enjoy!!

Update On My Success

Update on my success.

December 28th, 2010

" Something that you know is damning up the flow, Tear the damn dam down , Let me explain it...If you don't take the reigns its going to stay the same, nothings going to change if you don't change it!"

I know its been a long time since Ive blogged. I have been busy, busy, busy! I have been going through the part of Gastric Bypass that people don't talk about often...the settling in. I have been trying to get used to the new me,the new pouch, the new look on life. It has been an interesting time. I have had to learn to only take a 1/2 cup of food at a time, to re think food in general, and get used to the mental changes experienced with the transitions.

As we all know the whole point of Gastric Bypass is to help restrict my food intake in order to help in weight loss. So many people think that I have taken the easy way out but I beg to differ. I haven't had to many of the complications associated with Gastric Bypass. Thank God!!! However I still at two months post op can not eat beef at all. I have lost 55lbs at this point. I had hoped to be closer to 100lbs at this point but I am not giving up.

The holiday seasons have come and gone and I have not gained any holiday weight but my weight loss has been slower. The holidays are so different with the absence of excessive food. I am just physically unable to gore myself and I have mentally had to learn will power during the holiday season.

I am starting to learn allot about proper serving sizes, what to eat and what not to eat as well as the simple fact that you need to exercise to lose weight. I cant sit around eating cookies and properly utilize the Gastric Bypass tool properly. My first priority every day is protein and caloric intake. I try to eat around 1000 calories a day as well as 80 to 90 proteins a day. This is not easy. I am getting by but finding it hard to get it all in as I am simply not hungry any more.

As the holidays came I did let myself enjoy the celebration food just in excessively small portions. I still do encourage those who are thinking about doing the Gastric Bypass to go ahead and take the leap...start the process. It is one of the best decisions I have made in my life. I will try to keep you all in the loop more and my next blog will be more informative with recipes and routines that I have used with success. I hope all enjoyed a great holiday season. Remember to make a good resolution to get healthy this new year. feel free to call me with any questions you may have.

Dolly Parton - Better Get To Livin'

This is the theme of my blog this evening...Check it out!!! Great Great song!!

" Better Get To Livin"

"Better Get To Livin"

November 13th, 2010

"The day were born we start to die don't waste one minute of this life, Get to livin" - Dolly Parton

So as you all know about four months ago I decided to make a life changing decision and get off the couch, head to the doctors and see how to change my life. I decided on Roux Y Gastric Bypass, which I had on October 27th,2010. Since the operation I have been recovering body,soul,and mind at my parents home. I have rested, read, watched TV, caught up chatting with my folks, I have blogged, and face booked...But most importantly I have worked on ME, Not only will my physical body change but so will my mental emotions change. I needed to search ME and see what I needed, wanted, and where I thought my next steps would take me. Week one and two were tuff,painful, yet emotionally freeing. Now I am well into week three I have changed my focus to Living.

In the process of "Gettin to Livin" I have gotten up at 4:30 am to be at the Gym at 5:00am with my parents. Exercise is an important component of any weight loss plan and I figured three weeks post op was a safe time to start with the process. I have chosen to start slow so I don't hurt myself yet at the same time I get used to the Gym being a natural part of my daily routine. I am mostly doing cardio walking on the treadmill one mile a session at a speed of 20 min. I have also tried the elliptical which I hate and honestly hurts my surgical area and knees. I will slowly increase my routine with weights,biking, and maybe swimming with the family. I have made a pact with myself that change in my life is going to happen if for no one else for myself. I will give it my all so I can be a better me to those who need me. I have also Incorporated outside walking into my daily routine. After my tiny little lunch I have begun to take little excursions down to the Pier to enjoy the nice weather we have had here in MD. the Pier I have been walking to is about a half mile from the House so its been a good little work out for me mid day. And I must say I actually enjoy it...lol. I figure after I put my self through all this pain of surgery why sit around and wait for the weight to fall off. I need to get up and make it happen and in turn tighten the muscles so I look even better when it all falls away...lol

"No matter who you are, no matter what you do, you absolutely, positively do have the power to change."~Bill Phillips~ Some of you might read that quote and say "yeh right", what is he thinking, he has no idea of my situation.....I might not know of your exact situation BUT I know my situation was completely debilitating and in ways still is BUT I have chosen to live and not die, to enjoy life and not miss out, and to live my dreams not watch them walk past me. If this blog does anything Lord let it inspire change in peoples lives. You see I may not be perfect but I have come to see that when you're stuck in a spiral,to change all aspects of the spin you only need to change one thing. Change one thing and that result will inspire change in other areas.

I am leaving tomorrow to head to my home in PA . I am so excited to see my son who misses me terribly. I miss my wife as well and all the comforts of my home. However I will miss the comfort my parents have provided me. The support and care they have offered me has been awesome. I'm not going into the best of situations by going home but I know that God is in control and he has by back as I am a child of the king. The healing I have received emotionally and spiritually I pray will supernaturally pass on to those in PA that need it and that I will enter a peacefull situation that is condusive for my and my wives continuing recovery. You see my wife is still recovering from a back surgery 7 weeks ago.

I will leave you with this song quote :" Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead, Yesterday is a promise that you've broken, Don't close your eyes, don't close your eyes, This is your life and today is all you've got now, Yeah, and today is all you'll ever have, Don't close your eyes"-Switchfoot Don't waste it...."Get to livin".

Casting Crowns-"Praise You In This Storm" (live)

This has been my most treasured song during my recovery thus far...let it minister to you as I have.

My on going healing process

My on going healing process...

November 7th, 2010

"Eating everything you want is not that much fun. When you live a life with no boundaries, there’s less joy. If you can eat anything you want to, what’s the fun in eating anything you want to?" - Tom Hanks

Recovery from major surgery has its ups and downs. One minute you want to curl up in a fettle position and cry and the next you feel ready to conquer the world. The last week I have experienced both and believe me I am ready for the next step in this process. I have retreated to my parents home in MD for recovery where I can focus on my healing and learning how to live, eat, and function with this new stomach of mine. My parents have been here for me 100% they have made sure the transition from hospital to home was smooth and that all the changes I have needed to make were made with support and love, also a little guidance as they have been living healthy and losing weight for about a year now...Moms almost down 100lbs...WHOO HOO!!! "Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That's why it's a comfort to go hand in hand." - Emily Kimbrough

This week I have been taking it easy by doing allot of resting. I began this healing journey on liquids ,made the transition into solid liquids and now I am working on getting acquainted with soft foods. I have found it freeing that I cant eat as I once let myself. I can now consume about 2-4 ounces at a time. If I push it and try to for instance to sip water after I eat, I instantly have cramping and I just cant continue. I have found it hard to get past the mental changes I am going through as well. I am having phantom hunger...I'm hungry in my head ( at dinner I want a hamburger, at breakfast I want McDonald's etc) However I am not hungry in my stomach. I also feel as though my mind is morning the loss of my full appetite...Its weird and yet freeing as well. Changes are happening and as they happen chains are breaking. So as you can imagine as I am making these changes I still have temptation to pack in the food even though I cant physically handle it, the temptation is there...I just try to remember every time I am tempted to react in the same old way, I ask myself if I want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future and I am a pioneer all the way. There are only two words that will always lead me to success. Those words are yes and no. Undoubtedly, I've mastered saying yes. So I am now practicing saying no. My goals depend on it!

I have been trying to incorporate exercise slowly into my routine but as my sergeon has reminded me my surgery was a difficult one, I am pretty beat up. I am in constant pain at the 8 incision sites unless I am on my pain meds and even then it only takes the edge off. Mom and Dad have been diligent in getting me up to walk around the house and out around the block, out to the Mall and grocery store. This has also helped keep me sain...lol Mom and Dad have also scheduled activities to help me relax and rejuvenate. Mom and I went shopping and we got a new sweat suit, sneakers and some protein drinks to try. Dad,Mom, and I also got pedicures which was so relaxing and felt so good and rejuvenating.I cant wait to get to the gym and start a work out routine. As we all know the more I work out the better results I will see. There is so much to get involved in and so much I cant wait to do...Im so ready to "get to livin"

I have been working hard at following my directions and eating only the foods on my Dr's instructions...its not been easy but it has paid off as of yesterday I have lost 30 lbs...Woot Woot!!! I really am beginning to notice the weight loss in my face and chest. I of course cant wait to see more. I have really been getting allot of support from others on the losers bench which has really helped me in pushing through these first two weeks. My parents had a friend of theirs come and talk with me she had the Roux and Y Gastric Bypass as I have and she dropped over 150 lbs in 7-8 months... she went from a size 24 to a size 0. She looks simply amazing,She is in her fourth year post op and is living life to the fullest. Her story is so inspiring. I have yet to throw up...praise God!!!! Everyone says it will happen...but hopefully after my incisions heal. My belly looks wicked beat up and hurts often but it sure looks better than it did immediately post op. I have made it through all of my required injections of blood thinner with no blood clots. I have also worked on regulating my Bi Polar meds that are now all liquid (Boo) so I am feeling quit well. (I posted this belly shot to show how I'm doing and for people considering gastric that the scaring is minimal...please don't use this pic for any other projects with out my approval...lol)

I leave for PA to see my surgeon for my first post op appointment as well as to see my Wifey and Son who I miss so much. The plan is to return to MD for one more week of recovery after my appointment. I will be blogging more as the days go on, I have many tips, recipes and products to tell all you who are walking this journey as well. So keep checking back.

Here is a photo of me now...You can see the weight loss in my face from my first bloggs.

Reba McEntire Live in Concert Walk On

This song helped me get through the recovery at the hospital....Walk on!!!